


Three Times Red Almost Tells Liz He Loves Her (and one time he does)

by jackandsamforever



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-08-13
Packaged: 2018-02-11 21:06:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2083128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jackandsamforever/pseuds/jackandsamforever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Red keeps trying to tell Liz how he feels about her, but circumstances keep preventing him from doing so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set a long time down the road. Like my other 3 things fic, this is meant to be humorous and fluffy.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to the Blacklist.

Red smiled as he listened to Liz laugh again next to him. It was like music to his ears; especially since she rarely laughed anymore. It was usually a chore to get her to even smile these days. Her laugh was infectious, and he didn't mind that it wasn't directed at him, but at Aram. Aram had mentioned earlier that day in passing that he couldn't stay at the Post Office any later than 6:00 because he was taking his nieces to the last "Movie in the Park" of the summer. He had shyly invited Liz to come along, and when he'd noticed Red behind her, he had extended the offer to him as well. Red hadn't wanted to go, and had even opened his mouth to decline, but he'd looked at Liz and saw a glimmer of hope in her eyes.

It had surprised the hell out of him.

So here they all were; sitting on a thick blanket with hundreds of adults and rambunctious kids waiting for the movie to begin on the large, makeshift screen in front of them. The sky was barely tinged pink as the blackness of nighttime began to overtake them, resulting in the air quickly cooling to the point where they all had had to pull their jackets on. Red sat next to Liz, but she hadn't said much to him as she had spent the last twenty minutes chatting with Aram and his nieces. He didn't mind all that much because it afforded him the opportunity to observe her without her glaring at him for staring.

He smiled to himself as he recalled the other times she had caught him, and it had usually gone along with a punch in the arm or thigh. Sometimes he did it on purpose just so she would touch him; it was rather pathetic of him, but he took what he could get.

He didn't really know how to define their relationship. He knew she had feelings for him, but she had yet to really act on them besides a few fleeting touches and kisses on the cheek as she went to bed. She had been staying with him for a long time. Longer than he had ever dared hope.

At first she had told him it was because she only felt safe with him and Dembe around, but then they had eliminated Tom and Berlin, and she was still living with him. He didn't want to ask why, and she didn't ever explain her continued presence, so he just let it be. Even if didn't ever have the chance to be with her the way he wanted, he still wanted her to be near him.

He loved her. He hadn't at the beginning when he'd first entered himself in into her life. She had just been a means to an end; but his feelings had grown over the last couple of years and there was no doubt in his mind anymore. He just wished he knew how she felt. She kept her feelings close to her vest, but they spent all their free time together, so she must feel something for him; at least that's what he rationalized to himself to make himself feel better.

Red shifted to stretch out his arthritic left knee, which caused his right shoulder to brush hers. She stopped talking and looked at him with a raised brow. He reached up and squeezed her bicep, letting her know it had been incidental. She nodded, but didn't pull her arm out of his grasp, and instead leaned a little more into him. He was surprised, but didn't draw attention to it as Liz resumed talking to the little girl who sat in Aram's lap.

Red released her arm, but didn't move his body away and pulled his cell phone out to see if he had any messages. Nothing. Of all the times he wanted to be interrupted, and not even a damn voicemail. He sighed quietly and stuck it back in his pocket. He was bored out of his mind already, and he couldn't imagine the movie helping.

Finally after five long minutes, the flood lights surrounding them shut off, and the projector lit up and began playing the movie. He watched as the Disney theme song began to play and the blue castle appeared on the screen. He leaned closer to Liz and whispered close to her ear, "What movie are they showing, Lizzie?"

She turned towards him, finally finished with her conversation, and smiled. He could tell because her white teeth glinted in the soft light coming from the screen. "Why? Bored already?" She was making fun of him.

He tilted his head and traced a finger lightly over her cheek, then tucked her hair behind her ear so he could see her entire face. "Not at all. I was just curious."

She leaned closer, their faces inches apart, as she tried to interpret his expression in the dark. She laughed quietly and moved her lips near his ear. "Toy Story 3. Ever seen it?"

He glanced at the screen and saw that it was indeed Toy Story, then looked back at her and raised his eyebrows. "I've never had the pleasure." His voice was full of sarcasm, and he knew she could tell immediately that he was being a smart-ass.

Liz punched his thigh lightly and shook her head, then moved her body closer, but still left a few inches of space between their bodies.

He sat back on his hands with both legs stretched out and resigned himself to watching the movie. Maybe he could get away with taking a little nap.

Fifteen minutes in and his eyes were already beginning to droop. Maybe that's all he needed to do to get a good night's sleep; watch Disney movies. He must have drifted off, because next thing he knew, Liz had pressed her body to his side and was blowing in his ear.

His eyes shot open and he moved his head away so she would stop. "Lizzie," he whispered warningly.

She huffed a quiet laugh and whispered back, "Stay awake. It hasn't even been twenty minutes."

Red yawned and ran the hand that wasn't behind Liz's ass over his face and short hair. "I'm old. This is what old people do," he said in a low voice.

She squeezed his upper thigh, entirely too close to his groin and said, "Shut up, Red. You're no-"

She was cut off by the little girl in Aram's lap (he hadn't bothered to learn either of the girls' names)

"Shhhh. I can't hear what Buzz and Woody are saying, Liz!"

He sat up slightly and watched as Liz turned to her and apologized profusely (sarcastically, of course).

Aram hid his laughter and began to whisper something in the little girl's ear. Red turned his attention back to the woman still pressed to his side. He raised the arm that was behind her and experimentally put it around her waist to see how she would react.

He didn't worry about Aram seeing anything. He wouldn't dare say anything to Cooper anyway.

Liz sighed and seemed to just let go and sink into his embrace. He tightened his fingers and stroked her bare skin with the thumb that found its way under the bottom of her jacket and beneath the hem of her shirt. She didn't object and instead turned her face into his neck and inhaled, then exhaling slowly; her warm breath tickling his sensitive skin.

They sat that way for a long while until he couldn't feel his lower half anymore; he was loathe to move though, because he was enjoying their cuddling entirely too much. So he endured his discomfort and instead began to place feather light kisses in her hair and on her temple to distract himself. She moved her head a little and kissed his Adam's apple, then moved her free arm and wrapped it around his waist. He couldn't believe how forward she was being, but figured it must be because it was dark. Everything was easier to do in the dark.

He glanced up at the screen and saw that the characters were in a furnace and were moving towards their deaths; he still didn't care, but he could hear the two little girls and Aram all whispering "No" over and over again; it amused him to no end.

He decided to take a chance and pulled her back slightly so he could see her face. Before she could ask him what he was doing, he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her softly, sliding his lips over hers for a few moments before pulling back and leaning his forehead against hers. He wanted more, but not with hundreds of impressionable children around.

"Red," she whispered as she moved the hand that was wrapped around his waist up to his chest and placed it over his heart.

He needed to tell her how he felt. She needed to know that she wasn't just another one of his conquests. He felt like screaming it out so everybody could hear. He kissed her cheek, then moved his lips to her ear and said against her skin. "Lizzie, I need you to know. I lo-"

He was cut off by all the kids simultaneously screaming. They jumped apart like teenagers who were caught making out, and Red looked at the screen to see that the toys had been saved. He rolled his eyes and shook his head. What lousy timing. Just his luck.

Liz leaned back towards him and said quietly, "What were you going to say?"

He smiled and reached over to lace his fingers with hers. "I was just going to say thank you for inviting me here. I've enjoyed myself."

He could tell she didn't believe him. "Red-"

He cut her off by letting go of her hand and moving on to all fours. He looked back and smiled at her. "I can't feel my ass," he whispered; just loud enough for her to hear.

She laughed and leaned back on her hands, then turned her attention back to the movie. Their moment was gone.

He frowned and cursed the stupid movie in his mind over and over until it finally (finally!) ended. The lights flickered back on and he stood with a groan, then turned to pull her up. In the light, she was once again distant with him.

He sighed and walked next to her, their hands brushing, as they followed Aram and his nieces out to the car. He would get his chance to tell her; he just had to find the right time and not chicken out. He could face down hardened criminals without his heart rate rising above eighty, but Liz made him feel like a teenager asking a girl to his first prom. It was a foreign feeling; he didn't like it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set a few weeks or so after the first chapter.

"Lizzie, I'm sorry, I can't ignore my business any longer. I was made aware yesterday that I've neglected one of my business partners. He's threatening to leave for one of my competitors," Red said as he sat on the couch with his legs crossed looking up at Liz

Liz stood in front of him with her hands on her hips and an annoyed expression on her face. She'd just received a wedding invitation from a friend who she hadn't heard from since her college days. The wedding was in two days in Maryland, and she had just spent the last ten minutes trying to convince him to come with her.

Liz sat down heavily next to him with a huff of annoyance; he noticed that she sat far enough away from him that he couldn't easily reach her. He slid his arm over the back of the couch; his fingertips could almost touch her hair, but he refrained from antagonizing her further. Red swirled the ice in his scotch glass and waited for her to say something. He'd already told her why he couldn't go, there really wasn't room for argument.

They sat in silence for another five minutes. He glanced at his watch and sighed, noting that it was almost time for him to leave. He really hated leaving while she was upset with him, but he didn't have time to make up with her, and when she got like this it usually took her a few hours to come to him so they could talk it out.

Ever since he'd almost told that he loved her at the movie, she had pulled away from him emotionally and physically. It was almost as if she was afraid to take things further between them. He knew she was trying to protect herself, but he was frustrated with her and needed a break so he could think rationally; he was slowly being driven crazy.

He pulled his arm back and set his glass on the coffee table, then stood up slowly; his knees cracking painfully. He stretched his arms over his head and yawned. It was going to be another long day; only made worse by arguing with Liz. He turned to see her watching him and tried to smile. "I have to leave now. I do hope you'll go to the wedding, I think it would do you some good to get out of the house without me."

She crossed her arms and sighed. "I guess. How long are you going to be gone this time?"

He put his hands in his pockets and stepped closer to her. "Only for a few days. I'll call you tonight and let you know for sure."

She nodded, but didn't comment further. He pulled his hands out of his pockets then leaned down and put them on the back of the couch on either side of her head. She looked up at him, but before she could open her mouth to say something, he kissed her softly, then lingered for a few more moments when she responded. She reached up and ran her fingers across his jaw, then dropped her hand when he pulled back. That had been the first time he'd kissed her since the movie. It felt like he'd just had a weight lifted off his shoulders.

He stood back up and chewed on the inside of his cheek. "I'll see you in a few days time, Lizzie."

She just nodded, then watched as he turned and walked out the door. He knew she was still upset with him, but he really did have to work. He'd been putting it off for far too long.

OOOOOO

Two days later

Liz sat and watched her friend and her new husband greet the guests at the reception. She had decided only yesterday to come, and was glad she had made that decision. She'd been driving herself crazy for weeks trying to figure out what Red had been going to tell her that night at the movies, and as a result, she had pulled away from him; too terrified at the implications. She didn't know if she was ready to hear what he had to say. That had been the first time they'd kissed; the feelings that kiss evoked from her scared her more than anything.

She knew she was falling in love with him.

He had called yesterday to let her know that he would probably be back in two or three days. The phone call had been stilted and awkward. She hated it when things were like this between them. Especially because she had such strong feelings for him, and she knew that it was her fault that things had gotten so bad.

She touched her lips briefly and smiled at the memory of when he'd kissed her, then sighed and picked up her drink, if only for something to do with her hands. Her friend suddenly sat down in the chair next to her and exclaimed loudly, "Liz! I'm so glad you came! Its been what? Like eight or nine years now?"

Liz jumped slightly, but recovered quickly and reached over to give her a hug. She'd been so lost in thought that she hadn't heard her approach. "Yeah, its been a while. I was actually pretty surprised to see the invitation, but I'm so glad you sent it," Liz said as she pulled away with a smile on her face.

Her friend, Brooke, shrugged. "I figured there was no like the time to reconnect." She paused briefly and looked around the table, only to see that she was alone. "So what have you been up to? Last I heard you were off to the FBI academy."

Liz took a bite of the cookie in front of her and nodded. "I've been with the FBI for almost six years now."

"That's so cool! Is it everything you ever thought it would be?" She looked so excited that Liz didn't have the heart to tell her that it was _nothing_ like she had envisioned when she first entered the academy; oh and that she was in love with a wanted criminal who she had been forced to work with right out of the gate.

Instead of saying any of that, she just nodded and smiled rather unconvincingly. "Its been great. So what have you been up to, Brooke, besides getting married obviously." She forced a laugh and looked at her questioningly.

Her friend narrowed her eyebrows, then turned to look at all the empty seats at the table. "So are you married, or with anyone?"

Liz rolled her eyes internally at Brooke's intentional side-stepping of her question. "Um..I was married for a while..but it didn't work out." Brooke opened her mouth to say something, but Liz continued before she could. "It was for the best, believe me."

Brooke nodded and tried to smile. "If you say so. That's still a bummer though. So is there anyone special in your life now?"

Liz's mind immediately went to Red; but how would she even begin to explain him? "Oh, I date here and there," she answered, non-committal.

Brooke opened her mouth to ask something else, but was thankfully called over so she could have her first dance with her husband. She stood up then bent down and hugged Liz tightly. "Well I'm glad you came. We'll have to keep in contact."

Liz nodded, then watched as Brooke made her way across the large ballroom. She felt a pang of jealousy at how happy and _normal_ Brooke's life was. Liz would never experience that, but yet, Red was worth not having a normal life.

The lights lowered and the couple danced while everyone watched. She put her elbow on the table and put her face in her hand as she watched. She had worn Red's favorite blue dress and was bummed that he wasn't going to see her in it. The first song ended, and the MC invited everyone to dance during the next song.

She watched as couples paired off, and feeling a little sorry for herself, picked her cookie up and stuffed the rest in her mouth. That's when someone chose to approach her. He barely looked like he was legal. He smiled and said, "Will you dance with me?"

Liz held up a finger and hurriedly chewed and swallowed her cookie with an apologetic look on her face. She opened her mouth to refuse, but was interrupted by a low voice. "Sorry, she's already agreed to dance with me."

The boy nodded a little fearfully and walked away as Liz tried not to choke on the remaining crumbs in her mouth. She turned to see Red standing behind her in a perfectly pressed grey three-piece suit. She blinked a few times to make sure he wasn't an illusion,, and when he didn't disappear, a slow grin spread over her face. "Red, what are you doing here?"

He held out his hand and said, "Come dance with me, sweetheart."

She took his hand and let him lead her out among the throng of dancers while trying to resist the urge to kiss him then and there.

OOOOOO

She looked beautiful. Absolutely stunning. The two days that he'd been gone had been good for him, and he'd come back with a new perspective. He was going to go for it and tell her that he loved her tonight while they danced. She needed to know how he felt so she could decide whether or not to push him away for good.

As he pulled her close, wrapping his right arm around her waist and pulling her body flush with his, he leaned in and whispered near her ear, "I wanted to surprise you."

She laughed quietly and said, "Well you did. Did you get everything taken care of?"

He nodded and hummed as she let go of his hand and wrapped her arms around his neck, scratching his scalp lightly with her fingernails. "As much as I needed."

She nodded and laid her head on his shoulder as they swayed to the music. He kissed her temple, then her jaw as he worked up the courage to say what needed to be said.

"Lizzie, will you look at me for a moment please?"

She pulled away from him and looked at him questioningly. He smiled to put her at ease, then leaned in to press his lips to hers. He continued to ghost his lips over hers as he pulled her body closer to his. "Hmm, Lizzie," he mumbled, trying to work up the courage to tell her. She moved from his lips and began to place feather light kisses along his jaw. "Sweetheart," he said as he ran his hands up her back and leaned in close to her ear, "I just needed to tell you that I love-"

"Elizabeth Milhoan! I can't believe you were holding out on me!" Red pulled away from Liz, surprised at the sudden outburst. He looked around to see a grinning bride making her way towards them. Red ran a hand over his face and sighed. Interrupted again. That had to be a damn record.

Liz smiled shyly and shrugged. "I wasn't sure how to explain him." She turned to Red and said, "This is Brooke, the bride obviously." Then she turned back to Brooke and said, "This is Raymond." They shook hands and Brooke grinned again. "She didn't say a word about you, Raymond. I can't believe it."

Red put on his most charming smile and said, "We don't really know how to define our relationship, I'm not surprised."

Brooke nodded, taken in immediately by Red's charm. "Well it's nice to meet you. Feel free to eat and drink." She turned and patted Liz on the shoulder and said quietly, "You need to tell me all about him, soon." Then walked away to find her husband before Liz could answer.

Liz turned back to Red and grimaced. "Sorry about that."

Red shrugged. "Not a big deal. I once had a bride proposition me on her wedding night. Nothing surprises me anymore."

She laughed, then suddenly turned serious. "What were you going to tell me, Red?"

He swallowed and shook his head; the moment was lost once again. "I was going to say that I love your dress. Absolutely breathtaking on you."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck again. "Thank you." Her smile seemed a little less bright, and Red knew that she knew he wasn't telling her the entire truth.

He nodded and swept her up in her arms to dance to the next song. He'd get his chance to tell her sometime soon. Maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, poor Red, thwarted again. I attended my brother-in-law's wedding today, so this chapter was inspired by that. :) Thank you so much for the kudos and reviews for the first chapter. Thank you for reading! I would love to hear what you think. :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set one month later.

Red and Liz were still working their way through Red's Blacklist. It had been over five years, but he kept coming up with name after name. Every time she asked him how many more names he had, he always told her not to worry about it; that that time would come eventually. Frankly, Liz was tired of it all. Tired of being shot at. Tired of being in constant danger. Tired of hiding her "relationship" with Red. Tired of wondering if Red just wasn't going to come back one day and disappear; never to be heard from again. That was actually her biggest fear. She knew that he didn't believe himself worthy to be with her. She'd had the thought more than once that HE considered himself number one on the blacklist. That scared her more than anything.

So when they found themselves once again being shot at by a blacklister dubbed by Red as "The Stork" (whose actual name was Brandon Burke), she was just about ready to throw in the towel and resign from the FBI after they arrested him. She was taking cover behind a car; Red was behind the next car over, and various other FBI agents around the courtyard all trying to find a good enough angle to take Burke out. They'd been at it for over fifteen minutes, and Liz was down to her last clip. She knew Red didn't have much ammo in the tiny gun he held in his hand either. The Stork supposedly had a baby in his possession that he'd stolen from its mother to sell on the black market to the highest bidder. He was the lowest kind of scum in Liz's eyes, and she wanted nothing more than to put him away for life, or die in the shootout. Either was ok with her.

An agent to her right began to move, which caused Burke to turn and start shooting at the agent. Liz stood up and saw that his shoulder was exposed, she then aimed her gun and took the shot. There was a scream of pain as the assailant fell to the ground, and the remaining agents took the opportunity to swarm him and kick his gun away, then they quickly read him his rights and handcuffed him.

Liz glanced at Red to see him stand and nod in approval as she hurried around the car and up the steps of the large three-story house. She was the first to enter the house, and immediately heard the sounds of a hysterical baby coming from above her. She didn't stop to take in any details about the décor of the house as she sprinted up the wood stairs and followed the crying to a third floor room. She burst through the door and tried to slow her racing heart as she approached the white crib that held the baby. She reached the side and saw a tiny, red-faced baby dressed only in a diaper who looked to be no more than a couple of months old. She wasn't all that experienced with babies, but it seemed that some deeply ingrained natural instinct kicked in as she reached down and picked the baby up. She quickly checked inside the diaper to see that it was a girl, then cradled her to her chest and rocked back and forth to calm the cries that were beginning to sound hoarse; she had obviously been crying for a long time. She felt like going downstairs and putting a bullet through Burke's brain.

The baby quieted almost immediately as she began to suck on Liz's neck, clearly looking for something to eat as she hiccupped every few seconds. Liz turned to go find the team leader, when she came face to face with Red. He was looking at the baby with a small smile, and she couldn't help but stare at him and take in every expression that flitted across his face.

After a few moments she cleared her throat a little uncomfortably when he didn't say anything. "Red?"

He glanced up at her, and she was disappointed to see his mask of indifference back on his face. He raised his eyebrows in question.

"I need to talk to the agent in charge about what's going to happen to the baby."

He moved to the side and nodded. "Of course, I apologize."

She squeezed his bicep in acknowledgment as she passed him and made her way down the stairs and outside. Luckily it was a warm summer evening, so she didn't have to worry about wrapping the baby up in a blanket; and since Liz had picked her up, she hadn't cried once.

She approached the team leader who immediately looked at the baby and grimaced. "Sir, what's going to happen with this baby?"

Rogers shook his head and glanced around before looking at Liz again. "I'm not sure, Milhoan. It'll most likely go into state custody while they locate the mother."

Liz hugged the baby tighter and shook her head. "Sir, _she's_ been through a lot. We can't just drop her off with a stranger."

Rogers laughed lightly. "And we're not strangers?"

She sighed and looked over shoulder to see Red walking out the door with his perfectly pressed cream suit unruffled from their earlier activities. She didn't know how he did it, because she knew she looked like a mess.

He wasn't going to be happy with her when she told him what she wanted to do with the baby.

Liz turned back to Rogers with a carefully practiced innocent expression on her face. "Sir, I'd like to take her home until the mother is found." The FBI didn't know that she still lived with Red, and she had carefully hidden that fact from them for a long time by putting her address down as one of Red's houses that he purchased for that reason. It was fully furnished, and she stayed there a couple of times a week (with him of course), so the FBI never suspected anything. She had also kept all the baby items that she'd purchased years ago when she was going to adopt with Tom. She hadn't had the heart to throw it all out, and it had sat in her spare bedroom gathering dust since then.

Rogers sighed. "I'm not sure that you'll be allowed to keep her for long, but while I speak to my superiors about the situation, I'm authorizing you to take her home. Nowhere else besides your house. Is that clear?"

Liz smiled and nodded. "As crystal. Call me when you know for sure. I'm going to have Reddington take me home."

She saw Rogers open his mouth to object about Red, but then he just shook his head tiredly and pulled his phone out. Liz turned and quickly approached Red. "So guess what?"

He chewed on the inside of his cheek and grimaced. "You've been given permission to take the baby home." It wasn't a question. He knew somehow.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "How did yo...never mind, it doesn't matter. Is that ok?"

He continued to chew the inside of his cheek as he studied the baby, who'd found Liz's knuckle and was happily sucking on it. Liz couldn't believe how good she was being after what she'd just been through.

"Would it matter if I objected?"

Liz shook her head. "I'll just go to my house for a couple of days and you can come back after the baby's gone." She was disappointed by his reaction, but if she was honest with herself, she wasn't all that surprised.

Red sighed quietly and pulled his phone out, then pushed speed dial and put it up to his ear. Liz stayed quiet and listened as Red told Dembe to go to the store and buy baby formula, diapers, wipes and bottles, and then explain the reason why he needed them.

He pulled the phone from his ear. "I'm assuming you have clothing for a couple of days?"

She nodded as Red told Dembe that that was all and ended the call.

He grabbed her elbow and began to steer her towards his car. "Red, what are-"

His stride didn't falter as he spoke. "I'm not going to abandon you now, Lizzie. I'll help where I can. I may not like that you're doing this, but I can't change your mind."

Liz raised her eyebrows in surprise at his reluctant support as he opened the back door for her. She slid in and watched as he walked around the front of the car and slid into the driver's seat. He didn't say a word as he turned the car on and drove away from the crime scene.

She only just remembered that bastard Burke as they pulled away, and glanced at the cop car they were passing to see him glaring at Red's car. He should be grateful that she hadn't had the chance to see him or he'd probably be dead or close to death.

OOOOOO

Red glanced in the rear view mirror for the tenth time to see Liz quietly studying the small child. He wasn't all that happy that she had volunteered to babysit while they located the mother, but he wasn't surprised. She'd always wanted to be a mother; nothing would ever change that, so he wasn't going to deny her the opportunity.

They pulled in front of her (technically his) house and stepped out of the car. Red followed her up the stairway and into the house. He shut the door behind him and smiled when he saw that Dembe was already back and had piled all the supplies on the kitchen counter. Liz turned to Red and placed the baby in his arms. "Take her while I go dig up something for her to wear, oh and will you please change her diaper?"

She didn't give him a chance to comment before she turned to Dembe. "Dembe, will you sanitize a bottle and make one for her? Just follow the instructions."

Red shrugged his shoulders at Dembe, who looked at him with thinly-veiled horror as Liz turned and walked up the stairs. She hadn't asked for much, and he was a grown man. Changing diapers was like riding a bike right?

Red shifted the baby in his arms and shrugged off his suit jacket, then laid it down on the kitchen table and had Dembe throw him a diaper and wipes. He placed the baby carefully on the table and watched as she threw her arms in the air as an automatic reflex to the new position of her body; but she didn't cry. He quickly peeled back the tabs of the diaper and grew angry at how heavy the diaper was. It clearly had been a long time since the poor little girl had been changed.

He glanced up to see Dembe studying the tiny print of the can of formula, and pushed back the smile that threatened. He didn't need to antagonize the man further.

It took him a few tries, but he finally managed to get the diaper on the right way and realized it really was just like riding a bike. The baby began to suck on her fist as he leaned over her and studied her features. She had dark brown hair that was thin and wispy on top, with long, dark eye-lashes framing dark brown eyes. She was absolutely beautiful.

He smiled as she made a gurgling noise, and quickly frowned when he realized he was turning into a sap. If any of his enemies or business partners saw him now, they would laugh in his face.

Liz walked in and approached Red with a white onesie and a little pink sleeper in her hand. She handed them to him without a word, then walked over to Dembe to help him finish with the bottle.

Red quickly dressed the little girl, and that's when she finally began to fuss a little; he could tell she was done with all the jostling without getting fed.

Liz walked around the bar with a bottle in her hand that she began to shake as she reached them. "Good job, Red. I'm impressed," she said sincerely as she reached up and put her hand in-between his shoulder blades and scratched her fingernails over his back lightly. He loved when she just casually touched him, because she didn't do it often.

He turned to look at her. "I guess you never forget how to do these things." He smiled sadly as she squeezed his shoulder softly, then he turned and picked up the baby carefully. He cradled her in his arms as he gestured with his head that Liz should lead the way to the living room. She sat down in the recliner, then he handed the baby over and sat down on the couch next to her and just watched as the baby sucked at the bottle greedily.

He leaned back against the couch tiredly and unbuttoned his vest. "Lizzie, what do you want to call her while she's here?"

Liz looked up with a pensive expression. "I don't really want to call her anything, because then I'll just get way too attached. It's already going to be hard enough to let her go."

He nodded in understanding as he leaned forward and put his hand on her knee. "I understand completely. We'll just call her "baby"."

Liz's smile was a little watery, but he didn't draw attention to it as Dembe walked in the room. "Raymond, I'm going to check on a few of the other houses. Call if you need me."

Liz looked at Dembe and said with a smile, "Thanks for your help, Dembe. I really appreciate it."

Dembe nodded, then turned and walked out of the house without another word.

Red turned back to Liz as she pulled the bottle from the "milk-drunk" baby and put her on her shoulder to burp her. Red stood up and said, "May I?"

Liz shrugged and handed the baby up to him. He grabbed a cloth and threw it over his shoulder before softly patting the baby's back while walking around the room. Liz stood up and said over her shoulder as she walked out of the room, "I'm going to put the bassinet in my room. I'll be back."

Red didn't feel the expected panic at the prospect of being left alone with a sleepy baby; he was easily falling back into long-forgotten routines.

A few moments later the baby burped loudly then didn't move as he continued to pace around the room. He knew she was asleep, but was afraid she would wake up if he stopped walking.

Liz walked into the room a few minutes later and watched him with a wistful expression on her face. She finally said something after a minute or two. "The bed is ready for her. Will you carry her upstairs for me?"

Red nodded and followed her up the stairs carefully, then into Liz's room where a brand new white bassinet sat next to the bed. He walked over to the bed and set the baby inside carefully, then watched as Liz pulled a thin blanket over the top of her.

Red took a chance and slid his arm around her waist and pulled her close as they watched the sleeping baby. She didn't pull away, and instead put her arm around him, then leaned her head down on his shoulder and sighed quietly.

Her phone began to vibrate in her pocket seconds later, and she hurriedly pulled away from him and walked out of the room to answer it. He didn't follow, but garnered from her side of the conversation that she was going to be allowed to keep the baby until the mother was located. He was happy for her, but knew it was going to be hard for her to let the baby go when the time came.

She walked back in her room with a wide smile on her face. He opened his arms and she walked into them and hugged him as she told him what he already knew. He nuzzled his nose in her hair and whispered, "I'm happy for you, sweetheart."

She threaded her arms under his vest and around him in response. They stood like that for a little while until she muffled a yawn into his shoulder. He glanced at her bed side clock and saw that it was past 10:00 PM. He pulled away and said quietly, "Why don't you get some sleep while you can. I need to go make some phone calls while I can."

She nodded in agreement, and he took the opportunity to press his lips to hers softly, he pulled away then kissed her once more before stepping back and walking out of the room.

Down in the living room he removed his shoes, vest, and dress shirt, leaving him in his white undershirt and dress pants, then sat on the couch and made the phone calls he needed to make. When he finished, he saw that it was almost midnight. He reluctantly stretched out on the couch and resigned himself to having a sore back in the morning; he didn't want to be presumptuous and sleep with Liz without her inviting him to. They usually slept together, but they had yet to make love. She usually asked him to sleep with her, but she didn't tonight, so he would sleep on the couch. Their relationship was moving along at a snail's pace, but he was a patient man. He would wait for her for as long as it took; he already knew he didn't want anyone else but her.

Just as he was almost asleep, he heard a loud wail from upstairs. He didn't open his eyes as he listened to the cries become louder and louder. Liz's soft voice floated down in-between the cries as she tried to console the baby. She wouldn't be ready to eat yet so there wasn't much he could do to help.

Thirty minutes passed and the baby had yet to quiet down. He sighed and sat up slowly, his back already protesting as he stood up and stretched, then he made his way up the stairs.

When he walked in her room, Liz was walking around the room with the crying baby in her arms, her eyes glistening with un-shed tears in the light from the bedside lamp.

She stopped when she saw him. "She won't stop. What am I doing wrong?"

He shook his head and walked over to her. "Nothing. Sometimes babies just cry and there's nothing you can do to stop them."

She handed her to him. "Here, you try. I can't take it much longer."

Red took the baby and the blanket from Liz. He spread the blanket out on the bed, the set the baby in the middle and wrapped her up in a little cocoon. As soon as he was finished, he picked her up and cradled her against his chest then began rocking her in place. It only took a few minutes, but the baby stopped crying and fell back asleep.

Liz sighed loudly from her seat on the edge of the bed and shook her head. "How did you know to do that?"

Red set the sleeping baby back down in the bassinet and shrugged. "It was just something I remembered doing with my daughter."

She nodded and laid back down on the bed and pulled the covers up. "Want to stay?"

The corner of his mouth lifted as he said, "That's a stupid question, Lizzie." Then he slid into bed next to her. She immediately cuddled up to his side and threw her arm over his waist. He moved his arm under her neck, then turned to face her and slid his arm over her waist. She kissed his jaw, then his neck as she laid down on his shoulder and let out a slow breath. "Thanks, Red. You've been great."

He kissed her temple. "Only because I've done this before. You're perfectly capable."

She pulled herself closer to him in response and slid her hand under his shirt, then ran it from his back to his belly and toyed with the short hairs there. He willed himself not to overreact.

She moved her hand a little lower to the top of his dress pants and unbuttoned the button. He swallowed and said, "Lizzie, as much as I pride myself for my restraint, I _am_ male."

She didn't respond and instead slipped her fingers teasingly under the waistband of his boxer briefs.

He sucked in a breath and pulled her face up so he could kiss her. Her fingers began to move lower as she kissed him open-mouthed and hot. He pulled away from her lips and began to place kisses over her face and up to her ear. "Lizzie..sweetheart...I love-"

A sudden, loud cry from next to Liz startled them both so badly that when her hand pulled out of his underwear, the waistband snapped his skin painfully. He winced, then growled in frustration at being interrupted once again. At this rate he would never get the chance to tell her. He would just have to blurt it out one day and surprise her, which was looking like a good option at the moment.

She turned over and rolled out of bed, then picked up the small bundle again.

She smiled a little as she looked at him with regret. "Sorry, Red."

He tried to smile, he really did, but instead he pulled his pillow over his face and said as many profanities as he could before standing up and helping Liz with the baby. She was only going to be with them for a couple of days, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Always interrupted by something. I keep saying this, but poor Red. Thanks so much for the kudos. I truly do appreciate them. I would love to hear what you think! Thanks for reading and have a great day. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set one week later

As it turned out, the FBI had located the mother of the baby within five days. When Liz had handed the baby over to the agent at her doorstep, she had only waited as long as it took to shut the door before breaking down in tears. Red knew he couldn't say anything to comfort her, so he'd just held her and took care of her as best he could. He'd repeatedly warned her not to get too attached to the baby during those precious few days, but he'd known his words had fallen on deaf ears. She _had_ become attached, and it made giving her back that much harder.

Two days later, Red found her in her bedroom slowly packing away all the baby supplies into a cardboard box with the TV quietly playing in the background. He approached her and wrapped his arms around her from behind, then kissed her neck and said quietly with his lips against her skin, "Need any help?"

She hugged his arms to her middle and leaned into him as she shook her head. "I'm almost finished. I think it's time to give it all to Goodwill." She sniffed, but didn't let out the tears that threatened to fall. He pulled her impossibly closer and moved one of his hands under her shirt to lightly caress her stomach. "Lizzie..." He trailed off, not sure how to continue.

She turned in his arms and looked at him with raised eyebrows. He avoided making eye contact with her and tried to pull her close to him again so he didn't have to look her in the eye. She put her hands on his chest and resisted, then ran her fingers down his stubbly jaw (they'd been out all day chasing after a blacklister and had only been home for a short while; not long enough for him to shower and change). "Red?"

He cleared his throat and glanced at her eyes before looking away again. "Nevermind, sweetheart, I'm going to go shower."

He tried to move away, but she grabbed onto the lapels of his suit coat to keep him from leaving. "No, what were you going to say?"

Red sighed, already regretting what he was going to say before even saying it. They were close to finishing his list, and they had previously discussed about what they were going to do once it was finished. She had told him that she wanted to be where ever he was, and it didn't matter if she had to go on the run with him. The only thing she cared about was being with him. He loved her even more so because of her willingness to drop everything and leave.

He knew the FBI's immunity agreement was tentative at best, and he didn't know if they would uphold it, so he was prepared for every scenario. Except the one he was about to talk to her about.

He pinched the bridge of his nose briefly, then looked at her intently. "How would you feel about either trying for our own baby, or potentially adopting one?" He blurted out before he could change his mind.

Her eyes widened in surprised as she stared at him slack-jawed for what seemed like hours. Eventually she blinked, then smiled at him and wrapped her arms around his waist under his suit coat. She put her face in his neck and sighed. "Red, as much as I lov—appreciate you for the offer, and as much as I want a baby, I don't think that will fit into our future plans. It would be selfish, especially since we plan on leaving the country once your list is finished."

He slid his hands over her back and breathed an internal sigh of relief. A baby would complicate things greatly. "I agree, Lizzie, but I wanted you to know that you have options. I would never deny you the chance to be a mother."

She nodded, "I know that, but I've come to accept the fact that I won't ever be. I've come to terms with it." She began to tug his white dress shirt out of his pants in the back. Once she managed to free it, she ran her hands under the shirt and over his back, tracing her fingers over his scars. She had found out about them long ago, and had eventually come to terms with how he'd acquired them; and he was no longer self-conscious about her seeing or touching them. "Thank you, Red," she whispered as she leaned into him further.

He kissed her hair and slowly moved the pads of his fingers up and down her back. They were both exhausted, and he felt his eyelids grow heavy as she continued to move her fingers over his skin. As the room became quieter he heard something about meteor showers on the TV in front of him. He looked up to see the host of the 10:00 news talking about how there was a meteor shower that could be seen at that very moment, and it wasn't going to last much longer. That's all he needed to hear.

He pulled away from Liz, much to her chagrin, and hurriedly slid his suit coat off and threw it on the bed then loosened his tie.

"Red, what-"

He grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the doorway. "I want you to see something."

"I'm not really-"

"Humor me, sweetheart." She sighed, but didn't comment further as he tugged her towards the backyard, only stopping to dig a blanket out of the hallway closet.

He led her outside, then closed the sliding glass door behind him and propelled her forward until she stopped at the railing of the wood deck. Liz crossed her arms over her chest and shivered, it was freezing; she only wore a thin white shirt that she had worn under her work blouse, and a pair of shorts she had thrown on. He slipped the blanket over her shoulders and pulled her close.

She looked at him beside her. "Sooo, what are we doing out here?"

He smiled and pointed upwards. She sighed, "I'm not in the mood to stargaze, Red." But she decided to humor him anyway and looked up, then gasped. The sky was lit up with streaks of light that seemed to go on forever.

She looked at him and smiled. "You could have just told me."

He laughed quietly. "I wanted to see the look on your face when you saw the meteor shower. You didn't disappoint."

She rolled her eyes and looked upwards again, enthralled with the view. He watched her instead, and knew now was the best time to tell her that he loved her; how could he possibly be interrupted now? He moved behind her and wrapped his arms around her body over the blanket. He nuzzled his nose in her hair and began to whisper words she couldn't understand. "Hmm, Lizzie, Táim i ngrá leat." She tried to turn and look at him, but he didn't allow her to as he continued, "Je t'aime."

"Red, what are you saying?" She said as she looked up at the sky again.

He smiled into her hair, but didn't answer her. "'Rwy'n dy garu di," he whispered as he kissed the spot in the front of her ear and tried not to laugh at the look of consternation on her face.

"Ti amo, sweetheart," he pushed her a little into the railing as he moved closer to her.

She turned in his arms to look at him, and he allowed it this time. "That sounds familiar."

He smiled softly and spoke again, "Te quiero."

Her eyes filled with tears as she finally comprehended what he had been trying to tell her. He leaned forward and brushed his lips over hers, then pulled back and framed her face with his hands. "I love you. I've loved you for so long that I hardly remember a time when I didn't."

She tried to blink back her tears as she grabbed hold of his wrists and moved her thumbs over his skin. "I love you too, Red. Its been a long time for me too."

He briefly lamented at all the time they had wasted already, but quickly pushed that thought away and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was soft, almost reverent, as they both poured their true feelings into the kiss. They would have plenty of time for passion and raw emotion later.

Moments later, he pulled away and pulled her close again. She sighed contentedly and finally felt at home in the arms of her criminal. She didn't know what was to come for them, but they had each other and that's all that mattered to her.

She loved him and he loved her. Whatever they faced in the future, they would face it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, now that was so fluffy. I think I may need to pour some salt in my mouth to balance out the sweet. ;)..Thanks so much for the kudos, I truly do appreciate them. Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear what you think! Have a wonderful day. :)

**Author's Note:**

> The other 3 things fic was so much fun to write that this one begged me to write it. I couldn't turn it down..haha. I would love to hear what you think! Thanks for reading. :)


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